dreadedmonkeygod . net

Looks like I'm going to do without TV for another year at least. Why? Because I'll be living in a north-facing apartment.

Stupid but true. Satellites, dishes, digital signals gliding through the universe, all for naught because my windows face the wrong direction.

I thought we'd have this worked out by now. You know, plug it in and it just works. Instead, I'm dealing with azimuth/elevation tables and trying to ballpark where I can put the dish to get a signal.

And, y'know, my landlord has a few rules about how crazy I can get in persuit of Must-See TV. No messing with the plaster or the railings. No poles. I haven't seen the actual language yet, but I get the idea: On the patio, no shenanigans.

So: I won't pay $75/mo for cable, and satellite is a non-starter for technical reasons.

I was talking with my dad the other night about the push to require cable and satellite providers to offer a la carte channel options. He mentioned that this undermines the ability of new channels to get into the market: if you're unknown, nobody's going to order you individually. And if nobody orders you, you can't grow your audience. You're locked out.

Fair point. But there's nothing stopping providers from setting up "batches" of channels that can be bought together. ("Geek Channel Bundle", or "Sports Fan Bundle", etc.) And I have little doubt that the "basic package" will contain a bunch of channels bundled together that subscribers get for free.

And on the upside, Adelphia could finally bring in people like me, who really, truly, just want the local stations, CNN, Comedy Central, and HBO. I won't pay $75/mo for 200 channels, but I'll pay $25/mo for the 7 I actually watch.

Besides: the Net is going to change everything. If television providers want to live through the next 20 years, they're going to have to make a few changes.